PY to Eternity

Here are some of the notes I requested from Chris

and here is Char’s summary of the night, incl photos

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20/02/09
PY2E – BGR (Boy/Girl Relationships)

1.Introduction to Chris, Grace and Dating
2.The Bible on BGRs
3.The World on BGRs – JEMS
4.Q&A and closing remarks

2. The Bible on BGRs
Deuteronomy 6:5 => love the LORD with everything
your whole life is God’s… no part is kept away, including BGRs
God speaks through his word (the Bible).
What we need to know about BGRs come from the bible.
The bible doesn’t say anything about dating => a modern idea.
But speaks of marriage, dating having evolved from marriage
Dating => going out…, once or twice. A purpose in mind?
Courtship => marriage in mind
History of courtship dating
Marriage
Purposed – Genesis 2:20-24 => God made it, it was good, intended
Temporary – Mark 12:23-25 => not eternal! So it doesn’t matter somewhat

Marriage relationship
Role of husband and wife is different/unique – Col 3:18-19
Not command to men to subjugate wives
Not inferior, roles to play, like captain or dancing
Special, intimate, exclusive – Hebrews 13:4

Godliness in dating
Other person centred – Philippians 2:1-4 (Marriage is microcosm of Christian life)
It’s a Christian brother and a Christian sister
Stay pure! – (1 Cor 6:18-20)
Self and keep other person pure

Singleness
Good thing – 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 => marriage is for this life
Stay pure! – 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 => sex is for marriage only, a fish in water

3. The World on BGRs – JEMS (Juxtapositions, Extremes, Moderates, Submarines)
Core difference => Christian BGRs have goal in mind: marriage
All following points have extremes, moderates, ‘under radar’ and juxtapositions
Selfishness (Chris)
Jux: Christian relationships are meant to be unselfish
Extreme: use other people for personal gain
Moderate: have a relationship because there’s a void in MY life to fill
Submarine: looking for Mr/Ms Right… what about growing in godliness?

Commitment (Chris)
=> who said for certain they would go to a party a week before and go?
Jux: Christians are to COMMIT to the relationship
Extreme: ‘umm… friend’, platonic relationships, friends with benefits, no marriage
Moderate: flirting, delay marriage, not settling for one (thinking there’s a ‘better’ one?)
Submarine: looooong BGR, break up when things start going bad w/out trying hard. GenY means we want things to instantly work without hard work

Contentment (Grace)
Jux
Extreme
Moderate
Submarine

Security (Chris)
Jux: looking after the needs of this family unit is more than material
Extreme: someone’s wealth affects whether you want to be with them
Moderate: no marriage until you buy a house
Submarine: both finish FT study first, obey Chinese culture??

Romance (Grace)
Jux
Extreme
Moderate
Submarine

Tips
Our purity
Our growing in godliness (bible reading, pray)
Accountability/Model